D-Bus is the reason here, a system for communication between applications.
If you login into your desktop (i assume Gnome), a dbus-daemon for you user is started automatically. If you login per ssh, the dbus variables are usually set to use the already running D-Bus session from a Desktop session (was first weird to me..)
To see it in action, just use this:
You can use "watch -n 0.1 ps ux -U harry" to see the processes for the user "harry" using a different user per ssh. You can look at it during start of the Desktop session or during the ssh login.
A workaround is possible - to me it is a little like to betray the apps by giving them only the part they need.
This is from the dbus-run-session man page:
DESCRIPTION
dbus-run-session is used to start a session bus instance of dbus-daemon from a shell script, and start a specified program in that session. The dbus-daemon will run for as long as the
program does, after which it will terminate.
One use is to run a shell with its own dbus-daemon in a text‐mode or SSH session, and have the dbus-daemon terminate automatically on leaving the sub‐shell, like this:
dbus-run-session -- bash
or to replace the login shell altogether, by combining dbus-run-session with the exec builtin:
exec dbus-run-session -- bash
...
After you have the shell on the remote machine (i assume bash), run these commands:
> export XDG_CURRENT_DESKTOP=GNOME
> dbus-run-session -- bash
Then you have a shell and e.g. xdg-terminal worked for me. I assume the same applies to your use case.
How i got to this: I had a similar problem on my openSuse machine. After some hours i read a part of the D-Bus docs tried "dbus-monitor", "dbus-launch gnome-terminal" read the xdg-temrinal man page, and as last compared the XDG environment (env| grep XDG | sort), then use one of these variables.
The same Problem i had with the gpg passphrase dialog - is was using text mode when using ssh-X to login. but after starting the DBus, a GUI based dialog opened.