So, it's finally working, and while it's difficult to be sure, the problem seemed to stem from Snap somehow.
I went ahead and first attempted to uninstall absolutely everything that was causing issues. This quickly became quite a list:
sudo apt remove gstreamer1.0-libav gstreamer1.0-plugins-base gstreamer1.0-plugins-bad gstreamer1.0-plugins-good gstreamer1.0-plugins-ugly gstreamer1.0-pulseaudio gstreamer1.0-x libgstreamer-gl1.0-0 phonon4qt5-backend-gstreamer gstreamer1.0-gl libgstreamer-plugins-bad1.0-0 libgtk-4-media-gstreamer libqt5multimediagsttools5 libqt5multimedia5-plugins elisa
But I reasoned that if a dependency was missing or corrupted, then I wasn't getting full use out of it anyway. However, phonon
ended up introducing another ourouborous-type unfixable error. So, I plugged in my original LiveUSB, and attempted to, as nondestructively as possible, reinstall KUbuntu.
System files and settings were preserved, including config files. The first thing I did was install all available updates, then I got back to work. Blender was still on there because I just grabbed the binary, as is my custom. Krita needed to be reinstalled, through the Discover Software Center, but remembered all of my settings and my documents, which is great.
I even restarted to be sure, the old GStreamer bug had not come up. So, I went ahead and attempted to install OpenToonz with flatpak, instead of snap. I had to add flathub:
flatpak remote-add --if-not-exists flathub https://flathub.org/repo/flathub.flatpakrepo
After that, I could simply install the flatpak packages necessary for OpenToonz:
flatpak install flathub io.github.OpenToonz
This took a little while, but I now have Blender, OpenToonz, and Krita, all functioning on a properly updating system.
The one major difference is that I installed with Flatpak instead of Snap; what Snap's issue is, I can't be sure.