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How to change app button styles?

ar flag

In Cinnamon I find it difficult to tell which app buttons are depressed (selected). In KDE it's much clearer.

Here's the Snap Store in Cinnamon:

Cinnamon buttons

and the Snap Store in KDE:

KDE buttons

In Cinnamon it's not obvious to me that the darker one is "depressed" (I guess I expect the selected one to "light up", not darken).

How can I change the button style in Cinnamon? I played with a bunch of settings but didn't find any that affects this. (I'm a newbie - there are many, many settings and finding the right one is challenging; please be kind!)

If I have the choice, ideally I'd like old-fashioned shadows ala Windows 95...

I sit in a Tesla and translated this thread with Ai:

mangohost

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